Writing Clear Concise and direct sentences<br>

How to Write Clear, Concise, and Direct Sentences

1.   Unless you have a reason not to, use the active voice.

At the heart of every good sentence is a strong, precise verb; the converse is true as well--at the core of most confusing, awkward, or wordy sentences lies a weak verb.

There are sometimes good reasons to use the passive voice:

! To emphasize the action rather than the actor.

e.   After long debate, the proposal was endorsed by the long-range planning committee.

! To keep the subject and focus consistent throughout a passage.

f.    The data processing department recently presented what proved to be a controversial proposal to expand its staff. After long debate, the proposal was endorsed by . . . .

! To be tactful by not naming the actor.

g.   The procedures were somehow misinterpreted.

! To describe a condition in which the actor is unknown or unimportant.

h.   Every year, thousands of people are diagnosed as having cancer.

! To create an authoritative tone.

i.    Visitors are not allowed after 9:00 p.m.

2.    Put the action of the sentence in the verb. Don't bury it in a noun or blur it across the entire sentence. Watch out especially for nominalizations (verbs that have been made into nouns by the addition of -tion).

a.  An evaluation of the procedures needs to be done. b.  The procedures need to be evaluated.

c.  We need to evaluate the procedures.

d.  The stability and quality of our financial performance will be developed through the profitable execution of our existing business, as well as the acquisition or development of new businesses.

e.  We will improve our financial performance not only by executing our existing business more profitably but by acquiring or developing new businesses.

3.   Reduce wordy verbs.

a.  is aware, has knowledge of ----------> knows b.  is taking --------> takes

c.  are indications --------> indicate d.  are suggestive --------> suggests

4.   Use expletive constructions ("It is," "There is," "There are") sparingly.

a.  It was her last argument that finally persuaded me. b.  Her last argument finally persuaded me.

c.  There are likely to be many researchers raising questions about this methodological approach.

d.  Many researchers are likely to raise questions about this methodological approach.

5.   Try to avoid using vague, all-purpose nouns, which often lead to wordiness.

--factor, aspect, area, situation, consideration, degree, case . . .

a.  Consumer demand is rising in the area of services. b.  Consumer demand for services is rising.

c.  Consumers are demanding more services.

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6.   Unless your readers are familiar with your terminology, avoid writing strings of nouns (or noun strings!).

a.  patient program satisfaction

b.  student-professor relationship factors c.  processing step change

d.  competitive cotto salami performance test

e.  program implementation process evaluation

f.   MHS has a hospital employee relations improvement program. g.  MHS has a program to improve employee relations.

h.  MHS has a program to improve relations among employees.

7.   Eliminate unnecessary prepositional phrases.

a.  The opinion of the working group. b.  The working group's opinion.

c.  The obvious effect of such a range of reference is to assure the audience of the author's range of learning and intellect.

8.   Avoid unnecessarily inflated words.

Instead of                              Use cognizant of               aware of, know facilitate                      help

impact on                   affect

implement      start, create, carry out, begin subsequent to            after

utilize                          use

9.   Put wordy phrases on a diet.*